One very stupid word

Advocate - the plaintiff:.
- You are presented by his debtor?.
- filed.
- And what did he do?.
- Sent me to hell.
- Do you?.
- I came to you.

- You can not drink, you're wrong.
- Have you seen me drunk?.
- Why? .

- There are suggestions for how to celebrate Halloween is scarier?.
- Well. You can remove the scary women.

- Yesterday I told my boyfriend is one very stupid word.
- Yes?.
- That's just it I said,.

- He made a pilgrimage with his wife to the holy source. they prayed.
- So what?.
- Nothing. No miracle has not happened. With the same wife, and returned.

- Waiter! .
- What, I'm sorry?.

- You hang laundry?.
- No. I pardoned him.

- My wife made ​​me a religious.
- Not a fig!.
- Yeah. Before the wedding, I did not believe in Hell.

- We have to work for the late award denied. Do you?.
- And we have poured into the penalty area.

- How old am I? .
- Even I can not imagine.
- My daughter goes to kindergarten.
- She's the head?.

- Who are you?.
- horse.
- A Cho come from?.
- I'm still you can not lay.

- Why Medvedev terminator in Skolkovo lucky?.
- Prototype.

- Which is worse: ignorance, indifference or lack of culture?.
- I do not know and I do not care for it!.

- What to eat on the ship during the rocking?.
- The cheapest.

- Rabinovich, say you gave yesterday, in the face, and you did not react.
- Who has not responded? .

- Hello! .
- Do you have the room is a wire - he is a computer or in a box with lights?.
- In the box.
- Turn it into an electrical network.
- I tried. I have a light bulb flashing steel, I was frightened and turned off the.

The dentist leaves the room where the patient stayed.
And walks nervously from side to side, pulling the chin. nurse:.
- What happened? .
- Heavy! .

My husband is sitting at the computer and chopped into shooter.
Wife trying to attract the attention of a spouse:.
- Well, tell me, what do you want these monsters when you have me?.

Passengers traveling in a taxi, the man asks the taxi driver:.
- Stop, please, next to the house, well there in the end.
The woman adds:.
- Well, where is the cat.
driver:.
- You have the front or hind legs?.

My wife - her husband:.
- Do I sound so stupid?.
- You see, my dear, it's not so easy. I was always overcome by a feeling that you're stupid does not seem.

The daughter of one of my friends fell in love with other friends of her son - her six, he was 18, but she does not know.
Mom to her and says:.
- Daughter, he is 18 years old!.
She grabs his head with his hands and exclaimed in horror:.
- Lord, I thought - he 10!.

From monologue Drug dealer:.
- Forty minutes vparivayut client Viagra from existing arguments have only to show themselves or on the monument to Pushkin. Well, is about to break down the client and the pride he takes in a sample. And then the apotheosis! .
- And if his wife, then this thing work?.

Announcement in a building:.
Lift does not work. The nearest lift in the house next door.

If there is no shell turtle, it is naked or homeless?.

Russian President Dmitry Medvedev said the president of Belarus would be better to deal with the problems of the Belarusian. Whose problems would be better to deal with the Russian president, Dmitry for some reason did not say.

Public opinion is not asked, his form in order to have them all, who has his own opinion.

Rate the president has finally exceeded 100%.
Some of the respondents enjoy it twice.

There are two types of stupid people.
Some roll world, while others run by and shout, 'God, where this world is heading? '.

The next morning I looked out the window and there on the pavement, in large letters:.
I love you, Rita! .

When I said that clothes should be the caller, the caller does not mean compassion!.

Wives are prone to tantrums this morning, not evening.
Come home from work five times in the evening, and then in the morning.
And make sure.

No, I mean - to have sex with one woman - this is normal.
But the one and the same?.

The ability to feed a man makes a woman 1.5 times more beautiful and increase your breast size by 1 size. A drink - all of the above increases by about one-fifth.

What is the difference which of them to marry, if they all eventually get bored?.

A woman can not compete with a man until until after the day on the street drunk, completely bald, with a huge beer belly sticking out, no doubt with a second in her irresistible!.

Gentlemen should always know what the lady likes to make sure we did not find it, where you can buy.





Discuss.